Edward and Bella After Part 6

IF YOU HAVEN'T READ ECLIPSE OR ANY OF THE TWILIGHT SERIES DO NOT READ AHEAD FOR SPOILERS ARE UP AHEAD!!!!!  

Thank you.  
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I dug my nails into his shoulders as I clung to him.  This feeling was strange.  I could feel his teeth in my skin and warmth flooded over me.  But the pain was underneath that feeling as well, and it was slowly consuming me.  I heard his breath against my neck and I noticed it was unsteady; short puffs.  He was shuddering and was trying to calm himself.  I knew it had to be from tasting my blood, and I felt a wave of sorrow come over me.

The wave shortly changed into immense pain, and a blood curdling scream escaped my throat.

"</i>EDWARD</i>," I cried.  "Nnn-  "AAAAAHHH!!!"

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, I know..I know.  Shh, it's ok, hold on.  Hold on.  Forgive me, please forgive me.." he chanted in my ear.  

I managed to say, "Ed-ward..I'm s-so s-s-sorry, I..I.."

"Sorry for what?  You haven't done anything to apologize about!"

"Yes I have.  I'm s-so selfish a-and conceited, this has t-to b-be so h-hard for you.  I know my blood had to be hard t-t-to resist, and I'm sorry I made y-y-you go through that.  I've only co-concentrated on w-what I've w-wanted and..and.."

"What?!  Don't tell me you're actually worrying about me?!  Bella!  You, you're..  The things I'm hearing!

"Isabella Swan, don't you dare start worrying about me when you are going through something much worse!  Selfish?!  I asked you to let me do this, don't even..  I have taken you for myself, taken you from your family and friends forever.  I have taken you to live forever and watch your loved ones die around you.  I have gone against everything that I ever swore just to keep you with me.  I've done it not only because I want it, but because you want it.  If there was any other way I would take it; anything than put you through this.  If anyone here is selfish it is most definitely me!  Do not, Bella..  Do not feel sorry..it is I who have been pleading for forgiveness, the one who should be!  Please, don't take this out on yourself, especially during something like this.  If you want to hate someone, hate me, not yourself, please.."

The tears were coming faster now.  "You a-are a beautiful p-person..  I don't hate you.  I n-never could..  I ch-chose this willingly a-and I-I'm not going to complain ab-out it.  I w-wouldn't want this a-any other way.  I-I'm glad you did it, it's o-only f-fair, I think.  I only w-want you and m-me to be together f-for-ever..  Forgive me for b-being a little selfish?  I already f-forgave you a l-long t-t-time ago."  

"I already forgave you a long time ago, too, Bella.  Dammit, there wasn't anything to forgive in the first place!"

"I told y-you there was n-nothing to forgive, e-either.  I love you, i-it's all that m-matters."

“I don't deserve you, Bella Swan," he choked out.  He kissed me hard on the mouth and I was able to somewhat forget the pain and I gladly drank him in.  Suddenly a huge pang happened in my stomach and I whimpered.  He released me from his kiss with pain and worry in his eyes, and returned to chanting encouraging words into my ear.

I clung to him as the pain coursed through me, spreading through my veins and changing me.  I couldn't believe how different this pain was from what I felt in my hand so long ago.  Edward really hadn't been kidding when he was trying to explain what this would be like.  I was frightened, and I wasn't ashamed to admit it; and I did.

"I'm scared...I'm s-scared, Edward.  I will be b-brave, but I'm s-scared.."

"I know, you're doing well already.  Better than I did.  I was already screaming uncontrollably and thrashing by this point.  You're doing fine.  Really, just hold on, I won't leave, I promise."

"I kn-know..  I love you, E-Edward..."

"I know, love, I love you so much."  His kissed me quick and held me tighter.  "It's going to get worse..are you ready?"

"As r-ready as I can be.."

It was five minutes later that it got worse.  I couldn't help but scream again, my chest felt like a thousand knives were cutting me, trying to get to my heart.  My body was on fire, and I couldn't put out the flames as they consumed me.  My head was pounding and felt like it would explode at any second.  Edward just held me and chanted words of encouragement and love in my ear.  It was going to be a long night..

........................................................................................................

6:00 pm

7:00 pm

8:00 pm

9:00 pm

10:00 pm

11:00 pm

Midnight...

The pain stopped suddenly.  I could finally breathe.  Why did it stop, though?  It couldn't be over already, I knew that much.  I was confused, did something go wrong?  I was having a hard time talking through the after shocks of pain.

"Ed-ward?  Why did the p-pain st-stop?  Is everything al-alright?"

"Yes, everything is fine.  There will be pauses during the turning.  We don't really know why, maybe it's to help the body except the change, but they do happen.  However, the pain only gets worse after each pause.  It differs for everyone though.  With me there were five pauses...it was...well..  Rosalie only had three pauses though, so I don't know exactly how this is going to go.  Alice will see soon enough."

"Oh...Ok..  I ache all over..my muscles are all clenched; they won't relax.  My body feels like it's o-over a hu-hundred degrees.."

"Yes, that happens too.  You're doing very well, my love, I'm proud of you," he said with a sad smile.  

"How long do y-you think I have," I managed to ask.

"Probably only a few more minutes.  They don't last very long.."

He reached over me to grab something from the table that occupied the room now.  It was the cloth from the water bowl he had brought in earlier.  He wrung it out and placed it over my forehead for a little while and then patted my cheeks, neck, and chest to keep me cool.  The coolness against the fire of my turning felt extremely good and I was able to relax a little.  So we waited for the next wave...but not for very long.  

I stifled a scream, because I wanted to be strong.  I hid my face in his chest and bit my lip.  I forgot how hard I was biting and ended up cutting my lip.  Edward kissed me and licked the blood away, then returned to hold me as the pain rocked my very existence.  I was falling into a world of black..and I was more frightened now than ever.  It was only going to get worse.

...............................................................................................................

4:00 am

5:00 am

6:00 am

7:00 am

8:00 am

9:00 am

10:00 am

11:00 am

Noon...

Another pause.  I was sobbing by this point, and twitched from aches that flared up.  Edward was stroking my sweat-soaked hair back from my face and pressed his lips to my temple.  It felt good, since he was cold.  Who needed a bowl of cold water when I had Edward?

"Are you alright," he asked with tension in his voice.

"I'm..ok..  I ju-just hurt..a l-lot.."

"I know, stupid question really.."

"I'm s-st-still burning up...," I said trying to breathe.

"That will stop eventually.  Just a moment, love."  He let go of me and started to get up, but I panicked.

"No!  You said you wouldn't leave!  Please don't leave.."  He held me quickly again as I cried and said, "Bella, Bella, shh I'm just getting you a glass of water from the pitcher I have on the desk, remember?  The water will help you cool down a little.  I'm not leaving, promise."

"I know, I know, what’s wrong with me?!  I'm sorry I just..just.."

"Shh, don't talk, I understand, truly I do.  I won’t be a moment, promise."  He kissed my forehead and got me a glass of water, which he had to refill three times.  I couldn't believe how thirsty I was.  After I was sure I had had enough, he set the glass down and came back to hold me.  I was able to speak easier as the pain eased a little, and I was about to ask him when Carlisle and the others would call when his phone buzzed in his pocket and he pulled it out to answer it.

"Carlisle."

They were using the phones to talk to each other without actually coming in?  I was amazed.  I hoped they had unlimited minutes.  What a foolish thing to think at a time like this I had silent scolded myself.  His face switched between sadness, pain, and happiness.  "Yes, she's doing better than I thought she would.  She's being very brave.." he looked at me as he spoke.  This is the second pause she's had.  Has Alice seen how much more?  Ok I’ll talk to her about it then.  Yes.  Yes.  No.  No she didn't want it.  I know, but she was determined not to have it.  Yes.  I know.  Ok.  Thank you, Carlisle..for everything.  Mmhmm.  Yes, put her on.

"Alice, what did you see?  Two?  'Sigh', good.  I was hoping that she wouldn't have to go through too much.  Yes?  I'm not sure, not that I could really tell.  What's Emmett boasting about?  Haha!  I'm sure he does.  Tell him not to underestimate Bella, she's going to be a strong one I think, and I'm betting on her.  Yes.  Yes, I'm sure he did.  Ok.  Sounds good.  Hold on.  She wants to talk to you, Bella."

I took the phone with haste and practically yelled the name, "Alice!"

"Hey, Bella!  You're doing great, we're all so proud of you.  None of us wishes you had to go through it, but we are very happy that it isn't going very terrible so far."

I froze.  "S-so far, Alice?"

"Don't worry, you're going to do fine.  I promise.  See I told you Edward wouldn't leave you," she said with a smile in her voice.

"I know, I just...yeah."

"We know.  We’ll all be with you in there soon.  Don't worry, you're almost there, you're doing great."

"Thanks, Alice.."

"Rest while you can, you only have about five minutes before the next wave.  Let me talk to Edward again, ok?"

"Ok, here he is.."

"Yes?  Mmhmm.  I know I am, she has made me realize that whether I wanted to or not,” he laughed.  “Yes.  Yes.  Thank you, Alice, really.  I know, but still.  Alright, we'll see you soon.  Bye."

“I made you realize what?”

“How lucky I am to have you in my life, since it’s changed me for the better.”

“You better b-believe it!  What about Emmett though?  What did he want?”

“Ha!  Emmett is itching at the chance to arm wrestle you when this is all over.  I had mentioned that to him before, and so he decided to remind me that he was going to do it.”

“Ha, you told him about that?”

“Yes, and actually Rosalie is betting on you as well as Alice,” he said with a mischievous grin.  

“I’ve said it once, I’ll say it again, that you’ll never catch me betting against Alice.”

“Indeed,” he chuckled.

“Alice said about five more minutes, so it’s probably more like two minutes now.”

“I guess I should take advantage of the moment then, shouldn’t I?”  His lips parted my own as they touched and sealed his mouth over mine.  His tongue explored my mouth, memorizing everything, and made my head swim with pleasure.  He left my mouth and looked into my eyes.

“Your eyes are already changing.”

“Are they…”

“No they aren’t red yet, they’re actually kind of gray right now.”

“How interesting…”

“I will sorely miss the way your cheeks flush when I touch you,” he said while brushing the back of his hand on my face.  They flushed bright pink as they always did, and another sad smile crossed is face.  I smiled at him and put my hand on his cheek.  The moment did not last very long and what happened next terrified us both.  

Edward could not have prepared me for what happened next.  I went into the fetal position to try and stop the pain in my stomach.  It was burning, churning, and tearing.  Something was clawing at my insides, ripping me to shreds.  I was screaming, twisting, trying to claw at my skin to get inside and kill the monster tearing me apart.  Edward pinned my arms to my sides on the bed.  

“Bella!  Breathe deeply, you have to breathe!”

“I CAN’T!  I CAN’T, IT’S EVERYWHERE, IT’S RIPPING ME APART,” I wailed.  There was no scale of pain I could give him, this was nothing I could ever imagine, and my mind was frozen in terror of what the next wave would send my way.  He held me and breathed with me, but it still ripped through me no matter what.  I could only imagine what emotional pain he was enduring while listening to my screams…

………………………………………………………………………………………

2:00 pm

3:00 pm

4:00 pm

5:00 pm

6:00 pm

7:00 pm

8:00 pm

9:00 pm

10:00 pm

11:00 pm…

The last pause was here, and I felt colder.  Harder.  Not exactly like Edward, but I could tell my body was making the final changes.  My whole body was shaking with tiny aftershocks, and Edward simply held me close and rubbed my back trying to ease some of the ache.  His face was a shambles.  His eyes seemed more sunken in, his face harder, lips weak, and the dark circles under his eyes seemed almost black.  If he had been a normal human being, to everyone else he would’ve looked like he hadn’t slept in days.  I was worried; this wasn’t normal for Edward.

“Edward!  Are you okay?!  W-what’s wrong, your face is..”

“I’m fine, just a little…I guess you could say stressed out, but that doesn’t even really come close to what I’m feeling.  This is worse than I imagined it would be for me..and for you.”

“Oh Edward…  I’ll be fine, th-there’s not much more to g-go, and then I’ll be wrest-ling Emmett bef-fore you know it,” I said with a pained but sincere smile.  He had to laugh at that, the image was indeed all too funny.  

“I wish the others were in here, almost.  I wish they could see how brave you’re being,” he said.

“I know, but I didn’t want them to  see me in such a weak state.”

“Weak?  You are definitely not weak, Bella.  You’re doing wonderfully; you put my turning to shame.  I feel like a wimp now to be honest,” he laughed.

I giggled at that.  He was right though.  It had taken so much will power to focus on other things besides the pain.  It was impossible, of course, to completely take my mind off it, but at least I could deaden the pain in a sense.  Edward got me another glass of water and patted my head with the cloth again.  He reminded me of a nanny taking care of a sickly child.  In a sense that was true, to Edward in a way I was a child.  He was almost a hundred years old technically, and he was much more knowledgeable than I was about certain things.  Much more experienced, much more wise than I.  I managed to render him defeated upon many occasion however.

“Better?”

“Yes, thank you,” I said giving him the glass back.

“Are you comfortable enough?”

“I need to move to my back for a little while, my side is going to be worn off by the time I’m turned.”

He helped me move since I could barely move at all.  He adjusted the pillows of the golden sheeted bed so that they supported my head better and then sat on the edge of the bed.

“Alice was rather shocked when she saw you being turned, you know.”

“Why is that?”

“Well, Alice doesn’t remember her human life or her turning, remember?  She has never seen it happen before.  When she saw what you would and are going through now, she felt horrible in a way because she can’t remember that feeling and can’t share that with us.  We have always told her that she’s lucky she can’t remember, it’s not something any of us really wish we remembered.  However she feels that that’s kind of a way our family connects so well with one another.  She feels sort of like the “odd-man-out” if you will.”

“I’m glad Alice doesn’t remember this either.  I’m sorry she even had to experience it from just seeing it happen to me.”

“She has a new appreciation for it now, though, Bella.  She now knows, and that’s something she can take comfort in, in a way.  Do you understand that?”

“Yes, I think I do.  It’s similar to when I always felt bad about needing to be protected all the time when everyone else could do fine on their own.  Not really the same but…similar.”

He laid down next to me and wrapped his arms around my waist.  “Well, this isn’t something I can really protect you from, is it?  This you’re doing on your own.”

“Not really.  I have you with me, and that’s probably the only reason why I am doing so well.”

“I can deal with that,” he chuckled.

We waited for the next wave with fear, knowing that this was the worst to come.  I couldn’t imagine anything worse that what I had just experienced, until it happened.  The fire, knives, talons clawing; ripping.  Everything I had already experienced, combined into one.  That however wasn’t the worst part of it.  It was the electricity.  It touched every part of my system; my brain, nerves, veins, heart, lungs, everywhere.  I was the infamous metal rod and the vampire venom was the notorious lightning.  I screamed so high and loud that I wasn’t surprised that Edward jumped and looked terrified.  He immediately closed his arms around me and tried calming the storm that was now brewing.

Another ear piercing scream was followed by wails of pain.  This was too much, it was a sensory overload.  Edward looked completely lost, as if he had no idea what to do at this point.  I wasn’t too sure that he did.  

However, suddenly the expression changed.  He had an unusual look on his face.  I could almost imagine the light bulb over his head as he looked up in realization.  He held me even tighter so I couldn’t thrash about, put his mouth to my ear and started humming my lullaby.

Of course it would work.  It always calmed me, no matter what state I was in, and he knew it.  My arms froze and then went lax, and I was no longer screaming, but merely letting out grunts and moans of pain.  I focused my mind on the tune, trying to block out everything else and it helped.  We knew it would not take away the pain, but at least it was acting like the morphine I didn’t want.  I took comfort in that, and listened to Edward hum the lullaby over and over throughout the night…

………………………………………………………………………………………….

1:00 am

2:00 am

3:00 am

4:00 am

5:00 am

6:00 am

7:00 am

8:00 am

9:00 am

10:00 am…

The first one into the room was Alice.  She ran gracefully, as she always did, to my side.

“Bella, we’re here.  It’s almost over, you’re doing lovely,” she said as she brushed my hair.  

Edward was still humming, and he looked up to Alice to confirm something silently in their minds, nodded, and nuzzled his face back to the side of mine.  He didn’t stop humming once.  How could he hum it over and over for hours?!  I almost felt guilty for keeping him like that.

Next inside was Jasper, and as he saw me his face took on the expression of understanding sympathy.  He was frozen in the doorway as he watched me twitch from pain and convulse from the shocks.  No doubt he was remembering his own turning.  I expected the next person to be Carlisle, but was quite wrong.  Rosalie’s perfect figure ran into the room and took a place right by Alice.  She had worry and sadness in her eyes as well, and I started to cry more as she took my hand.  

“Bella, I know this probably isn’t the best of times, but I need you to know I don’t hate you for this.  I know what I said before, but I think I just didn’t realize how much I admire you.  We keep telling you how proud we are of your bravery, but really, Bella, we mean that.  You’re so much braver than I am, and you’re taking this all in stride and I just…I just wanted to you to know that.  Can you forgive me?”

I couldn’t believe my ears.  Was Rosalie..saying that she liked me?  Was she apologizing to me?

“Rosalie..I’m going to tell y-you what I t-told Edward a th-thousand times…  There is n-nothing to for-give..”

Her face softened even more than what she normally looked like.  Relief swept her face and he continued to hold my hand.

Carlisle, Emmett, and Esme bounded up the stairs into the room then.  Carlisle had to give Jasper a shake to wake him from his frozen state and Esme guided him into the room after Carlisle.

“Bella, how are you doing?  I can’t believe you didn’t use the morphine..”

“W-why should I w-when none of you had the p-pleasure?”

“You are an amazing person, Bella Swan, I’m honored to call you my daughter.  Edward?”  He walked over to the side Edward was on, leaned down to his ear, and whispered, “I’m proud of you, son, I told you that you could do this.  You did well.”

Edward looked into his adoptive father’s eyes and said, “I couldn’t have done it without your guidance.  Thank you for everything…”

“Bella,” Alice said suddenly, “this is the end of it right here.  It’ll go on for an hour or so, so hold on alright?  We’re all here with you.”

I was frightened, but relieved that we were so close.  I clung to Edward tighter and waited for the angrier blow.  

“Nnn-“ I gritted my teeth as the currents of electricity went through me.  Edward hummed again until it was over and I never screamed once.

……………………………………………………………………………………

“Bella?”

That voice brought me back to reality.  I popped open my eyes to see Edward staring at my face.  The surprise on his face I knew had to be from my red eyes.  

“It’s done,” Edward said.  He eagerly pressed his lips to mine and I put my hand to his cheek to keep him there.  I was so happy it was over, so happy to be with him and my family.

“Bella, how do you feel,” Carlisle asked me.

I stopped kissing Edward to ponder that for a moment.  I wasn’t sure how I was feeling.  I was tired.  Not the sleepy kind, but the exhausted kind.  The weak kind.  The hungry kind.  There was no turning back.  It was done.

“Honestly?  I’m a bit hungry,” I chuckled.  Everyone started laughing, even Edward.  We all knew now that it was over.

I was a vampire.


END OF PART SIX